When my husband Owen and I adopted Helen on October 31st, 2016, I had already anticipated changes in our lives. I was anxious about how our 5-year-old Shih Tzu/Brussels Griffon, Ellie, would react to her, not having had much exposure to other dogs in the household. I was anxious because we didn’t know anything about Helen’s medical history, besides the fact that she was deaf and blind. Perhaps it sounds cliché, but despite the many considerations that I had, I had never anticipated the incredible ways that she would change my life and outlook.
When Christmas came around, I began to grapple with the same question that I ponder over with some senior pet clients: What can I give her? She was past the age of playfulness with toys, not very active, and fairly slow-moving since she was overweight and could not see. I wanted to spoil her. (My mom gave her a stuffed toy – no squeaker. I don’t know if she was very connected to that toy, but I kept it at her spot on the couch.) In an attempt to answer that question for myself, here are the things I believe are most important to give to a senior dog, and they can be given at any time.
Helen and her Christmas gator!
1. Love
Love is the beginning and end of anything we could offer. Inherent in all of the following “gifts” is Love.
2. Patience
Perhaps you have a pet who struggles with incontinence or dementia. Helen could not see or hear, and relied on us much of the time for guidance – outside, to her food and water, etc. When Helen wasn’t napping, she seemed to have anxiety about being left alone as well. She would cry for me – and her cries could be very loud! (During one of her trips to the vet, when she was undergoing fluid therapy, she was crying so loud that she was making some of the kitties nervous. 😉 ) We did our best to be her patient guides, and a constant presence in her life. If we should be so fortunate, one day we too may find ourselves in a similar position.
Sometimes Helen would go on without my guidance, and she would get a little lost. 😉
3. A Tender Touch
I loved to hold Helen, to pet her, to rub her soft tummy and ears. To gently squeeze her wrinkles. Since she relied so much on her sense of touch, I tried to convey my affection for her this way. Hopefully she got as much out of it as I did. 😉
Within this I would also include your time. As much as you can spare, just to be with them. Helen taught me so much about being present and grateful for each and every day that I had with her.
4. A Warm Bed
I bought a dog bed for Helen, but it ended up not being used very often. Her spot was right beside us on the couch with her blanket; at night, I would carry her upstairs to sleep with us and Ellie in our bed. I wanted to convey that she was safe, and that she belonged. She was truly a “Velcro Pug,” and wanted to be right beside us – so that’s what we honored!
5. Your Best
I want to express that at no point do I want to seem judgmental. We are all just doing our best. Though Helen was “free,” we spent hundreds, if not into the thousands of dollars on her care in her few short months with us. I am very grateful that we were able to do so, and I realize that the same resources are not available to everyone.
When Helen passed away somewhat unexpectedly, I found some solace knowing that we did the best we could to care for her. I took her to the vet frequently, even when I felt like I was just being a neurotic pet parent. Just do your best to care for your senior dog, in whatever way that means to you.
What would you add to this list? What are some examples of material items you can give a senior dog? (I would love to know 😉 !)
4 Comments
Leave your reply.